The Object of My Child's Affection

Every parent has had it happen to them; you're late for work, and your toddler is holding you up in search of his favorite teddy bear. Or your seven month old will not stop fussing in her room because her binkie is no where to be found. As a parent you know how frustrating a comfort item can be in life. However, to a child the lack of his tattered and worn out blanket is what feels constricting. Really, comfort items are exactly what they sound like, and are a healthy and essential part of growing up.

By the time the average child reaches one year of age, they've already become attached to a security item that must be with them all the time. In children under age one, a pacifier or even their own thumb will often work very nicely to settle and comfort them when necessary. As your baby grows to toddler age, they frequently look for something a little bit more physically reassuring like the previously mentioned blanket or teddy. It is believed that the soft texture of such items is in part responsible for the warm effect they seem to have on children. Toddlers often pet a teddy or rub a blanket on their arm or face in order to sooth themselves.

An additional comfort feature a toddler could discover with comfort objects is the correlation they make with you as parents. Rubbing the material of the blanket on your child's cheek could remind her or him of your soft clothing or skin when being hugged or rocked by you. Or perhaps the stuffed animal has always been part of their sleep ritual you established with your child. Again, the association with you calming your little one or making him or her feel secure is what prompts the strong connection to these comfort items. Once in a while young children make a securtiy item out of less typical possessions. It could be just about anything from a piece of clothing to a hard toy truck. While this type of attachment is less noticeable, there is more than likley some emotional attachment the child has made to find security from the object.

Although it may be difficult for you to handle your child's persistent need for their teddy bear or blankie, it is imperative to keep in mind that this time of childhood is significant and healthy. The world is a fearful place to small children, especially as they reach their first birthday. It's during these early years that a child will begin to suffer from separation anxiety just as they are more likely to become separated from you resulting from a babysitter, playgroup, or even on their own as they are physically more capable of exploring the world around them. With a comfort item, your child is finding ways to soothe herself when you are not available for them and as they open their independence. Consider it a temporary support to lift them through this growing development in their lives.

It isn't usually until around age 3 that they begins to control their feelings and emotions and no longer need to rely on an object of comfort for comfort and security, according to Jane Kostelc, a child-development professional. Around this age carrying around a dirty old blanket may be less socially tolerated among your child's friends. Who knew our children had peer pressure issues so young? At any rate, it's perhaps better to regard this phase of your child's development as the milestone that it is. By doing so you'll help their emotional development and growth. something that is certainly worthy of momentary irritation.